Jokes about Amazon buying Whole Foods

Jokes about Amazon buying Whole Foods

This week, Amazon, in a bid to compete with retail giant Walmart, proposed purchasing grocery chain, Whole Foods, for $13.1 billion. That’s when the jokes started.

alexaJeff Bezos: “Alexa, buy me something from Whole Foods.”

Alexa: “Sure, Jeff. Buying Whole Foods now.”

Jeff Bezos: “WHA- ahh go ahead.”


paycheckAnd we all know how much it costs to shop at Whole Foods:

Amazon buys Whole Foods for 13.7 billion, roughly equivalent to 11 shopping bags of their organic berries.

Who among us can leave a Whole Foods without spending $13.7 billion?

After seeing what Amazon is paying for Whole Foods, it’s nice to know I wasn’t the only one overcharged.

If I had a nickel for all the “Whole Foods is expensive” jokes I’ve seen today I could probably buy some peanut butter at Whole Foods.


amazondroneFuture Prediction:

AMAZON, 1998: hello we sell books but online

AMAZON, 2023: please return to your Primehouse for your nightly Primemeal, valued Primecitizen

Can we expect avocado toast delivery via drone?

 

How to “Show, Don’t Tell”

A Writer's Path

by Chrys Cymri

I’m still getting used to the life of a self-published author, particularly in this age of Amazon and customer reviews. Authors are advised that books need to have reviews, the more reviews the better, even those which are not entirely positive.

In order to obtain those reviews, I’ve been involved in various ‘review exchanges.’ I read one writer’s book and post a review, and s/he does the same with one of mine. Better yet are the non-reciprocal reviews set up by groups on Goodreads, in which people sign up for a review round and the moderator ensures that you are not reviewing the work of someone who is reading your book. This is to ensure complete honesty.

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Vampire & Single – Part 13 The Final Fight #ASMSG #Vampire #Paranormal

Vampire & Single – Part 13 The Final Fight #ASMSG #Vampire #Paranormal

BlondeWriteMore

Welcome to the final part of my blog series – Vampire & Single. 

Last week after escaping from her hospital basement prison Sasha realised she had to return and face evil Viktor by herself. Viktor would never stop in his quest to gain her special vampire powers.

This is the story of Sasha, an ordinary twenty three year old woman who never wanted to become a vampire. Through this serialised story we have seen Sasha struggle with her physical transformation and learn she is no ordinary vampire.

Part 13 – The Fight

I have returned to my prison cell to wait for Viktor.

If I don’t put a stop to Viktor my life will always be spent running from him or living in fear that he will do something terrible to me.

Before I returned to my basement cell I broke into a store-room and tore the wooden leg off…

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Tell Me a Story Chuck Jackson

Tell Me a Story Chuck Jackson

Annette Rochelle Aben

 

Tune into the  Tell Me a Story podcast and meet author, blogger, Vietnam Veteran, and cancer survivor, Chuck Jackson.  Yes, this man has been through so much and his story can inspire each of us to see the gift in anything.

Chuck’s book One Month, 20 Days and a Wake Up is a fictionalized account of his time in Vietnam as a member of The United Stated Air Force and it’s (as the subtitle of the book states) one man’s story of what it meant to be a PJ.

Want to know what a PJ is? Listen to the show

Thank you for enjoying this podcast and saluting my guest, Chuck Jackson!  Thank you for FOLLOWING him on his blog, his Amazon Author Page and for leaving Chuck a kind review after you buy his book.

*All podcasts are posted in alphabetical order

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Meet Guest Author Linda G. Hill…

Meet Guest Author Linda G. Hill…

Check out this post by guest author, Linda G. Hill, on The Story Reading Ape Blog

Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog

Hi there. I’m Linda, and I’m an author. It’s been a long, straight road since I wrote my first novel during National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) in 2004. That particular piece of *ahem* literature still hasn’t seen the light of day, mostly because of how much I’ve learned about writing since.

To back up a bit, my writing career began when I was four years old. I remember having one of my parents staple a stack of paper together so I could write a book. They encouraged me to just draw pictures, but I wasn’t having any of that. I wanted to tell a story. Unfortunately for them I could only spell the words “I” and “the” at the time, so I bothered them unceasingly. Since then, I’ve been writing in my head if not on paper or the keyboard. I can’t not do it. It’s a part of me.

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The Broken Life

Check out the book, The Broken Life, by Jaye Marie, as featured on the Entertaining Stories blog

Entertaining Stories

It’s my pleasure today to welcome Jaye Marie to Entertaining Stories. She and her sister have a blog tour going on, and it’s their first one. Please make them feel welcome, and share this post across your social media.

***

Interview with David Snow/Broken Life

I have interviewed David Snow before, but usually in my office. This time I am visiting him in the hospital, where he is recovering from the horrendous injuries he sustained in The Broken Life, the third book in my mystery thriller series.

I’m not sure what condition I will find him in, but I believe he is almost ready to be discharged. As my job as editor I have to find out what his plans are for the future. Rumour has it that he will be retiring, but I might have other ideas about that. It would be a shame to lose him now, as…

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Smorgasbord Guest Writer – Part 2: Tales of the Old Gods by Horatio Grin

I shared Part 1 of this fascinating guest writer’s post yesterday. Here is part two of Horatio Grin’s guest post on the Smorgasbord Invitation blog

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

I am delighted to welcome as a guest writer for the next week the esteemed Horatio Grin who takes us back in history to the beginnings of the legends and myths surrounding fairies. Today Horatio explores the origins of the old gods.

  You can find out more about the author here:https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/2017/06/19/smorgasbord-guest-writer-19th-june-to-27th-june-author-horatio-grin-biography/

Part one – Lost Beginnings of the Fairy Races

https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/2017/06/20/smorgasbord-guest-writer-part-1-lost-beginnings-of-the-fairy-races-by-horatio-grin/

Part 2: Tales of the Old Gods by Horatio Grin

As we saw, the fairy race may have originated around 40,000 years ago. Yet, we know nothing about the fairies and very little about humans for much of this time. In this period the Ice Age reached its maximum extent. For thousands of years there were glaciers a mile high where London and New York stand today. Much of Europe and North America were bleak frozen wastelands.

About 12,000 years ago the ice began to melt, marking the rise of man and creating…

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