TRIMMING: the art (and pain) of honing your (wordy) masterpiece into a (finally readable) story

Another great post from Dan Alatorre on the topic of trimming your writing.

Dan Alatorre

coverUsing my unreleased manuscript An Angel On Her Shoulder, I am showing you step by step how to rework your story into a tighter, more readable, more enjoyable piece – and putting real examples of my own writing out there to highlight it. (To start at Chapter 1, click HERE)

Here’s what I did this time.

The “final” version comes first today, followed by the original, but this time I bolded allllllllllll the stuff I took out. (I would highlight it, but that doesn’t show up on some phone services, and a lot of you read on phones.) To view it best, bring up the two versions in different windows and see them side by side.

What you’ll see in the untrimmed version is a story that is quite readable and tells you lots about the characters.

The trimmed version does, too.

In fact, the untrimmed version is…

View original post 8,884 more words

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